


When I First Saw You, I Said "Shoot Her, Goddammit!"

by Bookworm4567



Series: Broken [7]
Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: Drabble, F/M, Mentions of Sex, Unrequited Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-03
Updated: 2020-01-03
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:27:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,934
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22060288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bookworm4567/pseuds/Bookworm4567
Summary: Some weeks into their "Relationship" Pentious reflects on how he met Cherri and how they got from trying to kill each other to...well, HERE.
Relationships: Cherri Bomb/Sir Pentious (Hazbin Hotel)
Series: Broken [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1561432
Comments: 14
Kudos: 142





	When I First Saw You, I Said "Shoot Her, Goddammit!"

**Author's Note:**

> Fuck this fic because I had to re-write this THREE FUCKING TIMES before I was happy with it! I hope you guys like how it turned out, anyway. Enjoy :3

She lay beside him in his bed, arms tucked around her pillow and her bare back rising and descending in her sleep, the bedcovers pooled around her waist.

Pentious lay awake despite his own exhaustion, watching the way Cherri Bombs eyelashes flickered against her nose whilst she dreamed, having fallen asleep almost immediately after she came. Dear sweet Satan, he still couldn't fathom it, one of his greatest rivals, a sinner he had tried on numerous occasions to obliterate, now slumbering in his bed after a night of passionate sex? How in Hell did _that_ happen?!

Carefully he raised a hand and brushed his fingers through her messy hair, the spiky blonde strands soft between his scaled fingers. His tongue flicked out and he tasted the scent of her shampoo, cherry, of course, with a hint of nitroglycerin underneath. Cherri sighed softly in her sleep, low and content and sleepy, and his heart warmed at the sound.

Bah! Were he not at risk of waking her he would have laughed out loud at the absurdity of the situation. Three months ago he and his minions were shooting her with ray guns and now he was wary of waking her after spending the night with her? Ridiculous!

And yet now his hand was trailing over her hair, his scales brushing her neck until he was stroking the bare skin of her shoulder, his fingers counting her freckles, touching her tattoos. She didnt have them when they first met, he remembered.

He thought back to then, mere decades ago, when he had been in Hell for over a century and (mostly) unrivaled. It was just after an extermination and he had been in the process of expanding his empire to the late Lord Asmodeus' territory and she had been there, turning up like a bad penny and perched cross legged on a decimated building, armed with nothing more than a couple of bombs and a wicked smile.

 _"Hey Old Man, didn't anyone tell ya I called dibs on this place? If you know what's good for you you'll turn your ass around and_ fuck off!"

Oh, how he'd laughed! She, a demon barely out of the fiery gates, thinking that she could challenge a villainous mastermind like _him?!_ Absurd! 

And then she'd turned the bombs on him, and to this day he still had _no idea_ how the harlot TNT nightmare had gotten onto his ship!

 _"SHOOT HER! SHOOT HER, GODDAMMIT!"_ he'd screamed, guns blasting crackling rays as the walls of his ship began to crumble around himself and his henchmen.

And yet, he hadn't been the one to walk away with new territory that day. He hadn't walked anywhere at all, his Eggbois had to carry him out of what remained of his headquaters! Once he'd recovered he had sworn revenge on the little upstart, but when he'd located her at her home she had...well...blown him to kingdom come and smashed almost all of his henchmen, cackling the whole damn time.

And so their epic rivalry had begun. For years they would engage in battle, him winning some, her winning others, him working harder to create better weapons and defences to his ship and her gaining the striped freak as a new ally some years in the game, which had been completely unfair and _completely_ against the rules!

Oh, how he hated her! And with each battle, each defeat, each taunt, each cocky smile and her clothes just getting smaller and smaller, he had only grown to hate her more! Over the decades it had gotten so that he would wake up thinking about how much he hated her, he would work on his weapons thinking about how much he hated her, he would eat thinking about how much he hated her, and when he went to bed at night he would fall asleep with her face in his minds eye and thinking about how much he completely and utterly _despised_ the demoness Cherri Bomb!

...Yes, in hindsight, it should have been pretty obvious to a super genius like him what was truly happening. But he didn't truly realise it himself until about three years ago, the day that it all went to Hell.

They had been warring over the territory Overlord Nero had left behind after his cannibalistic demise. Cherri Bomb and the spider whore had jumped out from behind a dead demon coated in candle wax and they had gone at it as usual, the air stinking of gunpowder and electric heat and fried egg in no time flat. One of the whores gunshots had caught him right in the stomach and it had catapulted him onto his back. Cherri had stood over him, laughing with her hands on her hips. 

_"Hey, do you ever think 'Maybe I'm getting too old for this shit?'_ Edgelord?"

Pentious had hissed-that damn nickname, he had no idea where in her coke-riddled mind she had dragged _that_ up!-and was ready with a retort. But then the harlot fucked up.

_"OH FUCK! CHERRI, GET DOWN!"_

But it was too late. The fool had accidentally lit one of Cherri's Big Boys and the blast had destroyed half the street and blown the cocky demoness right off of her feet.

And directly into his arms.

It was like being hit by a bus. He later told himself that it was some strange survival instinct, he way he had grabbed her around the waist. A way to make sure that she didn't attack him whilst they laid prone against each other on the ground, but at the time he couldn't breathe, his world stopping in an instant and containing nothing other than the feeling of his enemys body against his own. Her skin, so soft beneath his hands, a sheaf of her strawberry hair draped over his face, the scent of her fruity shampoo engulfing his senses and making his head spin. Pentious had gasped, a blush rising against his cheeks.

It ended as soon as it had begun, of course. Cherri reared up and punched him so hard in the face that he saw stars and then the battle was back on. Pentious had slithered away with no territory, a wounded ego, and a whole lot of emotions that he did not want to deal with.

He tried to rationalise it, of course. After all, despite her loathesome personality the little bitch was, he supposed, very _pretty,_ what with her lovely figure and long strawberry hair and a voice that sounded like it could belong to a concert singer, and...and he admitted it _had_ been a long time since he had indulged in carnal pleasures! That was _obviously_ all it was! He didn't fancy the little whore! He was just...pent up!

However, after that day it seemed that his mind became fixated on Cherri Bomb and not in the way that it was used to. He did not fail to notice the way her clothes kept shrinking with each new fashion trend, showing off more and more of her milky white skin, he realised that it was the sound of her laughter that kept making those irritating fluttering sensations in his belly, even when it was directed at him, and at one point he had gotten close enough to smell the perfume on her neck and had to release her lest he give in to the overwhelming desire to lick her neck.

That battle he had willingly lost, fleeing whilst screeching that he would destroy her next time! _"And your little spider, too!"_

After that, however, Pentious had to face the truth: he had a crush. On his worst enemy. How _humiliating!_

But he refused to let it interfere with his work, and so when he and Cherri would battle he would put all of his efforts into defeating her and whatever hapless sidekick she brought along because he would not-would _not-_ allow his conquering of Hell be delayed by some scantily clad seductress!

But then came the night at Mimzys. The night he had to show off, the night Cherri had sat beside him and teased him and worn his hat, the night she had run her foot up his tail and played with his shirt buttons and stroked his face. When she made her little proposition, he knew he should've said no and he tried, he truly did! But in the end, how could he resist?

That night he got to have her in his arms again, and this time she was willing. When he pressed her against that door and kissed her for the first time, he was sure his heart was going to explode. When she arched her back and cried out for him, he thought he would faint at the pleasure that exploded within the hollow husk of his body.

And now here they were, three weeks later and laying side by side after their fourth sexual tryst. This time he had made her come screaming his name, and Pentious had to hide a smile in the inside of her thigh.

Now he watched her as she danced in dreamland, sighing in her sleep as she rolled into her back. In her slumber her nose crinkled, her lips pursing cutely and he smiled. He knew a lot of sinners who would cut their own arms off to get what he had in his bed!

And yet...he found himself wanting. Because while Cherri Bomb was _very_ open minded in the bedroom (perhaps a little too open minded, he was still having nightmares about the spiked butt plug) there was just one, tiny, bitty thing that Pentious found himself irked by.

She never stayed past dawn. 

Oh yes, he knew how pathetic it was but he couldn't goddamn help himself, alright?! After a night of vigerous relations he would wake up to a cold side of the bed that still smelled of her perfume. He never asked her to stay, he knew what this arrangement was-he was a Victorian, not an idiot!-and he knew that any attempt to keep her here would just alert her to the fact that he had feelings for her, or worse make her end the whole thing altogether.

Did that make him a loser? HA! Of course not, for if there was one thing that the future ruler of Hell was not, it was a loser!

...But still, he couldn't help but have the occasional fancy, just once in a while, of what might occur if he woke up one morning with Cherri still beside him. Perhaps he would cook her breakfast-he did make a rather delicious egg on toast if he did say so himself!-and as they ate maybe they would converse together, laugh together, he might even be bold enough to take her hand over the breakfast table and maybe, just _maybe,_ she would squeeze him back, smiling that cute smile she had, her beautiful pink eye bright with affection.

Ha. He could dream.

Of course it was only a fancy, it would never really happen. Cherri would never have feelings for him and he had accepted that. But for now at least, he had her sweet body beside his, witnessing her dreams, seeing her face relaxed with sleep and so, so beautiful.

He leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to her warm cheek. She sighed in her sleep and rolled her head towards him, a soft smile gracing her lips that made Pentious feel things that he would never admit.

Yes, for now, until the sun rose, he had this.

**Author's Note:**

> Look out for my next fic because it features more Molly and its the one I've been DYING to write! Stay tuned.


End file.
